Today, I wanna start my memoirs to that happy little yellow family. You know, the one that gained mass popularity in the 90's? The one everyone stopped watching after the 10th season in unison and drone on about how unfunny it is? The one that has been the longest running sitcom in over 30 years? Yep... that's the one. The world famous THOMPSONS EVERYBODY! Lets roll we are burning daylight! This is my personal episode collection with quotes for season 1!! lets! get! BIZZAY!
Ok, Vol. 1 gets the boring intro I know I know, I'll make it short. As you can tell, the late 80's were a HUGE growing point for me. I had become aware of what I liked movie wise as I explained. Hair Metal was huge in my book, like huge I had established a love for rock and roll music before anything. And then, I turned 6 and a show came on TV, one of the many, that would influence me. I had already known obsessive TV and merchandising through the Ninja Turtles and ALF, they were my TV jam spots. I will eventually write about them too! It started with a TV preview for a Christmas special. And I was totally into cartoon Christmas specials. I tuned in with my cousin of course. My life was just gone at that point. Pee Wee Herman had made it ok for me to act like a doofus. The Simpsons, made everything funny and real because, they were MY family!
They have touched my heart in the darkest places to bring me back to life with just a simple one liner. They have helped me sleep. They have watched me grow up. They have helped me cope with loss, taught me political humor, and above all.. Gave me purpose, oh, and a really unhealthy coping mechanism by reciting quotes, all the fucking time. Everyone can keep Seth McFarlane to yourselves, I don't need him around for sure. This was always true to the core comedy to me, still is. While everyone called it unfunny I never gave up hope, and as we go further into Simpsonism, maybe my suggestions will make you laugh, Like a crazy person!
Lets get started with Season 1! This is my personal top 5.. out of 13 episodes so... uh... enjoy! These aren't in any favorite order, just my stand out 10.
Simpsons roasting on an open fire
This is it! The episode that made me a fan. I understood and was able to laugh out loud at the scenario because as I said, my family WAS the Simpsons. I could relate to the entire thing during the holiday season. My dad worked like a dog to get us Christmas presents, and there was always some kind of funny drama going on. I even related to Bart's tattoo, because all I ever wanted my entire youth.. was a tattoo. This episode is full of fun moments from start to finish. It was one hell of a series premiere. Homer playing Santa and going through the class made me laugh out loud even as a kid.
Bart: Hey, Santa, what's shakin', man?
Homer: (as Santa) What's your name, Bart-ner... er... little partner?
Bart: I'm Bart Simpson. Who the hell are you?
Homer: (annoyed) I'm Jolly ol' Saint Nick.
Bart: Oh, yeah? We'll see about that! (Pulls off Homer's Santa beard, just as their photo is taken)
Homer: D'oh!
Homers Odyssey
Another favorite that made me really feel for Homer, who after losing his job at the Power plant, contemplates ending his life, and its really an emotional hit, mixed with, hilarity to still make you feel good. It showed the family dynamic, and established how Homer really felt about his family. ALSO, we get to see a black Smithers and get more familiar with Otoo and Bart's classmates who just got their start in this run of characters. If its one thing I love about the Simpsons more than most, it's the side character build, there's an entire universe of people in one town.
Homer: I'm just a technical supervisor who cared too much.[phone rings]
Moe: Moe's Tavern.
Bart: [on phone] Is Mr. Freely there?
Moe: Who?
Bart: Freely, first initials I.P.
Moe: Hold on, I'll check. Uh, is I.P. Freely here? Hey everybody, I.P. Freely![barflies laugh]
Moe: Wait a minute. [talks into the phone again] Listen to me you lousy bum. When I get a hold of you, you're dead. I swear I'm going to slice your heart in half![Bart and Lisa laugh]
Homer: You'll get that punk someday, Moe.
Moe: Oh I don't know, he's tough to catch. He keeps changing his name.
Call of the Simpsons
This episode is my favorite of the entire season. There are a ton of moments that still make me laugh to this day. The idea of the Simpson in any type of survival setting only promotes hilarity more. Like in later episodes with several apocalyptic scenarios, that just ended up a funny hoax. I love the look of the Simpsons camper too, Homer tried so hard to outdo Flanders, but in the end, it's typical Simpsons.
German Scientist: This much I believe we can agree upon: this specimen is either a below-average human being or...a brilliant beast.
Homer: Boy, the guys at the plant are going to have a field day with this one.
Marge: I am sorry this happened. Good night, my...brilliant beast!
Homer's Night Out
Another great episode! The Simpsons already started making their mark on serious topics, making them hilarious. The trouble of marriage and what you can do when caught in the moment were already topics on the show at this point. I remember being younger seeing this and wanting a spy camera... For some odd reason, never got one or I would have exposed everyone at their weak point. Maybe it's better I didn't get one... But this episode did have one of the greatest quotes ever!
Homer: I have something to say to all the sons out there. To all the boys, to all the men, to all of us. It's about women, and how they are not mere objects with curves that make us crazy. No, they are our wives. They are our daughters, our sisters, our grandmas, our aunts, our nieces and nephews. Well, not our nephews. They are our mothers. And you know something, folks? As ridiculous as this sounds, I would rather feel the sweet breath of my beautiful wife on the back of my neck as I sleep than to stuff dollar bills into some stranger's G-string. (Princess Kashmir wipes a tear away) Am I wrong? Or am I right?
Bart The General
I was always the victim of bullying from a really young age. I guess in the end no one really liked me. This episode was the hardest hitting for me and I cheered Bart on the entire time as he took a stand against his mortal enemy. I imagined doing the same to everyone that gave me a hard time. It made me feel better watching someone take a hilarious stand. It also made me love Abe Simpson for life.
Homer: So you had a little scuffle, eh? Heh heh. Hope you won.
Bart: I'm going to miss you, big guy.
Homer: Bart, your mother has the fool idea that you're upset about something.
Bart: Dad, I need help. Please.
Homer: Now, come on, Bart. We don't want your mother to see you crying.
Bart: Oh, man...
Homer: Let me help you dry those tears.[Homer uses the hairdryer to dry Bart's tears]
Homer: So, what's the problem, son?
Bart: I had a run-in with a ... bully.
Marge: A bully?
Homer: Come on, Marge, I don't bug you when you're helping Lisa.
Marge: Bart, I hope you're going straight to the principal about this!
Bart: I guess I could do that.
Homer: What? And violate the code of the schoolyard? I'd rather Bart die!
Marge: What on earth are you talking about, Homer?
Homer: The code of the schoolyard, Marge! The rules that teach a boy how to be a man! Let's see; don't tattle, always make fun of those different from you, never say anything unless you're sure everyone feel exactly the same way you do.
That's it, narrowed down to 5 episodes! These are the ones that stuck with me, the ones I'll always remember! Stay tuned for more, and go watch The Simpsons!
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